Saturday, August 27, 2011

How I got pregnant

If you googled your way over here in the hopes of reading about heaving bosoms and throbbing members and glistening whatever... you're in for massive dissapointment. How did I get pregnant? In the usual way. Which might not sound like it's worth writing about, particularly in the absence of any entertaining details. What makes it worth writing about (I think) is that last time I did not get pregnant in the usual way. Last time, after approximately 18 months of failed attempts, we sought help from medical technology. We were never diagnosed with anything particular but were told that after 18 months of no success, our chances of conceiving on our own were less than 1%. We did a few of rounds of assisted reproduction and on the third attempt it took.

This time, for various reasons, we did not want to go that route. With "less than 1%" echoing in my head, I figured the chances of a sibling for la cocotte were slimmer than an ultramarathon runner. And for 10 months... nothing. Less than 1 % seemed about right. Meanwhile I continued my habitual reading of infertility blogs and came across one women`s story of conception. No diagnosis but no success in reproducing until... she came across a trick. Her writing came across as quite embarassed to have even tried it and definitely she did not attribute her success to this particular trick however she did say that for two years she had no success and the month she tried this trick it worked. Possibly coincidence. Probably coincidence. But she was putting it out there just in case it could help others.

So, on my 11th try, I used her trick. And I`m pregnant. Possible coincidence. Probable coincidence. But I wasn`t pregnant and, well, now I am. And I too am a little bit embarassed and sheepish to advocate this as a "sure fire fertility booster". I really do think it was dumb coincidence BUT if you send me $19.95 in a self addressed envelope, I will mail you back.... ok, totally kidding. Talk about bad karma. Here is the dumb secret that probably did NOT do the trick but now is reponsible for two "documented" pregnancies after months of lack of success... I am still embarassed to actually type this but here goes. Bicycle legs after sex. Legs in the air, supporting the hips from underneath the hipbones so that most of your weight is on your shoulder blades and upper back and bicycle your legs for a few minutes.

You read it on the internet. It MUST be true.

9 comments:

  1. Bwahaha!! Love it (but you know, secretly, thanks for the tip :) )

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  2. Interesting. Will remember that for an immediate future (not to do bicycle legs)(well...maybe not that immediate unless I get rid of his girlfriend fast) and a distance future (to do bicycle legs) :)

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  3. Funny.

    But seriously. You can't say "skinny like an ultra-marathoner". They are surprisingly beefy. Compare Yiannis Kouros or Scott Jurek to a long-distance runner. The theory is something like people with bigger muscles are able to withstand the really longer distances, but it really holds true.

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  4. A friend recommended your blog to me. I got pregnant with my first the good old fashioned way. Am now trying for our second via IVF. I have blocked tubes caused by scar tissue from my emergency c-section. Glad to discover your blog and see you are having success. Also, before I was forced to just walk for exercise thanks to huge ovaries I was a triathlete and have plans for coming back as a pure runner once we have a second child. Anyway, great blog!

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  5. Okay, that was disappointing. I had to add my own 1970's p0rn music: Boom chicka wah-wah.

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  6. PPC, well, I can't believe SR failed to mention this, but that very "trick" worked for us twice, well, three times. I just thought everyone did that. We call it "the plow" (same thing minus the cycling).

    I loved the heaving bosoms and throbbing members. If you were a romance novelist, I might actually get into it!

    Had to tell you. I got asked for the second time in my life today if I was pregnant. Obviously I'm not. God. All those times I wanted people to ask when I actually was - but NooOOOooo.

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  7. Whatever works eh?! Great story.

    I had the same thought as Fast Bastard - definitely the wrong group of athletes for a skinny reference :)

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